{"id":580,"date":"2025-09-25T22:36:05","date_gmt":"2025-09-25T22:36:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/?p=580"},"modified":"2025-09-25T22:36:05","modified_gmt":"2025-09-25T22:36:05","slug":"light-seeking-shadow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/light-seeking-shadow\/","title":{"rendered":"Light Seeking Shadow"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Written for and originally published in Coin Operated Press.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier walks into the hospital with a shaking hand to his head. The Wanderer had snuck up behind him, and he\u2019s dizzy and nauseous after taking a hit. As he makes eye contact with the receptionist, his vision darkens, and before he can open his mouth, the waiting room silences to black. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier blinks. He\u2019s in a hospital bed, and someone is speaking in a gentle, authoritative voice. The conversation is a train that left without him, and he cuts in, confused. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, what?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier\u2019s voice is raspy, and as he blinks the room into focus, he meets a pair of steely green eyes through glasses. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Doctor Zayne holds a clipboard and gazes back at him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019ve written this down, don\u2019t worry. I know your memory may struggle for a few days. You\u2019re experiencing a concussion as a result of the head trauma you encountered on your mission today. I was just asking whether you live with a roommate or if there\u2019s someone who could stay with you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier touches his fingertips to the bandage on his head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRight. Um, no roommate. And\u2026no one I\u2019m comfortable putting that kind of responsibility on.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He looks around the room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCan\u2019t I just stay here? If it\u2019s a matter of cost, I\u2014\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cUnfortunately no,\u201d Zayne cuts him off. \u201cWe\u2019ve got a high volume of patients, and we need the bed for those requiring more critical care.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zayne checks his watch. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cPatient Services opens at 8 AM tomorrow. Is there anyone in town who could look after you? I can\u2019t discharge you unless it\u2019s into someone\u2019s care.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier sighs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo. It\u2019s just me. But I\u2019m sure I\u2019ll be fi\u2014\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zayne cuts him off again, his voice betraying exhaustion. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s not how it works, unfortunately.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He closes his eyes, rubbing tension out of his jaw. \u201cSorry, I shouldn\u2019t have interrupted. I\u2019m just tired; I didn\u2019t mean to be short. I\u2019ve exceeded the 80-hour limit again, so I\u2019m being sent home after I sign off on your discharge.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He pauses, staring into space before speaking once more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSince I can\u2019t log any more hours, though, I might have a solution that gets us both out of here in a timely fashion. You can stay with me tonight. Tomorrow, we\u2019ll look into care options.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier\u2019s eyes widen, and he stammers. \u201cI\u2014no, I couldn\u2019t trouble you like that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zayne shakes his head, looking away. \u201cIt\u2019s no trouble. You\u2019d be doing a favor getting me out the door.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He sighs, meeting Xavier\u2019s gaze once more. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cXavier, I know it\u2019s been a while. I know I should have reached back out. Honestly, I haven\u2019t known how, so\u2026can you let this be a start?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier lets out a breath he didn\u2019t realize he\u2019d been holding. He hadn\u2019t been in any position to call out the tension between them, but now that Zayne had, it\u2019s like he can finally drop the facade of formality. He sighs, wincing as the throb of his headache comes back into focus. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYeah. Okay. I\u2019ll come to yours.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier sits on the sofa as Zayne draws the curtains. He tips his head forward, closing his eyes and taking slow, deep breaths. The lights and motion and general stimuli of the drive had been nauseating. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He hears a shuffle and a soft tearing of paper, then feels a hand on his knee. Zayne\u2019s gentle voice drifts up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSmell this. It\u2019ll help.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

An astringent scent fills his nostrils, and as he raises his head, he sees Zayne squatting in front of him holding an alcohol wipe. He takes it, freeing Zayne\u2019s fingers to drift up and ghost over a bruise near his temple. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re lucky this wasn\u2019t worse,\u201d Zayne mutters. \u201cIf you\u2019d lost consciousness in the Protofield\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut I didn\u2019t,\u201d Xavier snaps. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He closes his eyes, taking a breath to try again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSorry. I didn\u2019t. And\u2026I don\u2019t have the energy to have this conversation again. My job is too dangerous. Yours is too demanding. Neither of us has the time, so why should we even bother.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They\u2019re both silent for a moment before Zayne breaks through with his soothing baritone, both hands now resting on Xavier\u2019s knees.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIs that how you thought it went?\u201d A flicker of sadness crosses his stoic face. \u201cYou thought I was saying I didn\u2019t want to try?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier\u2019s eyes remain shut as he leans his head back. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow else was I supposed to take it?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zayne lets out a slow breath. He stands, stretching and then sitting sideways next to Xavier on the sofa. He leans his temple against the soft leather of the couch. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYour job is dangerous. My job is demanding. We don\u2019t have the luxury of time or security. So while most people figure this out between dinner dates and phone calls, we\u2019re going to need to figure it out between missions and night shifts.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He brushes Xavier\u2019s hand, letting his fingertips settle into the hollow space between thumb and palm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI never said I didn\u2019t want to try, Xavier. I only meant we\u2019d have to make it count.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier\u2019s eyes open to Zayne\u2019s face just a breath away. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou said my memory isn\u2019t working right now. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

What if I forget all this by morning?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zayne chuckles softly.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019ll just have to remind you.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He lets go of Xavier\u2019s hand, leaning over and reaching for his work bag. He digs around for a moment, pulling out a notepad and a pen before rising. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRest. I\u2019m going to make you something to eat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Xavier pulls his legs up to his chest, tucking himself under the blanket on the couch and closing his eyes as he lies down. He hears a rustle of cloth and paper as Zayne places something on the coffee table next to him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

As soon as Zayne leaves the room, he opens his eyes and spots a note. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

From the desk of Dr. Zayne Li<\/strong>
You have a concussion.
You\u2019re staying at mine tonight.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And this time, I won\u2019t let you go.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Written for and originally published in Coin Operated Press. Xavier walks into the hospital with a shaking hand to his head. The Wanderer had snuck up behind him, and he\u2019s dizzy and nauseous after taking a hit. As he makes eye contact with the receptionist, his vision darkens, and before he can open his mouth, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":241,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-580","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=580"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":582,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580\/revisions\/582"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/241"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=580"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=580"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bayleewrites.com\/poetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=580"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}